Victoria Hash House Harriers Runs - 2016

Victoria Hash House Harriers' Annual General Pissup - where some hashers who got elected to Mismanagement.  The run was just the right length, if not a bit wet, running through the North, South Jubilee, with a BC planned for Victor School, but ending up in the dry living room of SBC's home.  It wasn't so dry as Digger had brought, not one, but two kegs of beer from 4 Mile House Brew Pub - a Pilsner, and there Best Brown Ale. Stoolie provide a hearty beef barley soup, and there was bread and vegetable with dip, snack foods, and fruit turnovers.  Other out cums will come from our new Hash Scribe (I hope).  All I remember (after the keg) is winning a bottle of Hoyne Voltage Espresso Stout for having set the most hashes this year.  SBC put up 3 award (a new thing for the AGPU), one of the other was the most runs attended, of which, having already won the most hashes, the 'runner-up' won.  The election details can be found here. (there to the best of my memory)

The 21st annual Goldstream 'Salmon' run.The Oncorhynchus were running and so were some of us; there were a lot of walkers.  This was one of the warmest Goldsteam runs that I can remember, and I have been doing these since the2004 run, which Deep Shit co-hared.    On this run he joined the walkers.  He was a bit worried that the runners had got lost - a number of the trail marks had been rubbed out -, and they didn't; worried that it would be cold an wet, and it wasn't.  It was nice.  The blue berry tea was great, and so was the beer, in my view (some may have called it un-real beer).  We even saw some livesalmon, but many dead ones too.  The on-afters was well attended at Ma Miller's, which is back, having been closed for a bit.  They now seem to have regular comedy nights to draw patrons.  The pub is a 152 years old this year!

This was Guy Fawkes' and Bonfire Night Run (if you are unfamiliar with this click here). The pineapple express made for a soggy, leafy trail.  Jonners reset major trail marks that got washed out, and as no one got lost, most likely did a fine job of sweeping. One had to feel some sympathy for Hares that set trails in the rain. A history of Guy Fawkes and the Gunpower Plot was read out by Jonners at the first hash halt, and a very good reading of the Guy Fawkes poem was given in front of the British Columbia Parliament Building.  Lakey did a great job of keeping the walkers just ahead of the runners, and ensure the walker had refreshment when they made it to the BC just a bit earlier than the runners.  This was the last of the 3:30-start runs so the sun was just setting on the down-down, which was fairly short, but good given we had a fresh brew from Preemie.

"Life is full of adventure. There's no such thing as a clear pathway." (Guy Laliberte - co-founder and the former CEO of Cirque du Soleil.)  This was the 4th Cloverdale school run set by SMCAF, and it is becoming legendary - see last year's 656.  It was a lovely fall day, and perfect for running or walking.  Our hare, unable to run, had bravely set the trail on his own, and had set a very ambitious trail - the following week's bike hash was shorter!.  The walkers were led by the hare to the BC.  With no sweep, a  trail requiring some dodging of golfers on the golf course, slow runners, lost trail marks, a very long run, and at least one injured runner, the run would become an exercise in ... 'forgiveness'. After all the Hare is a good guy, and well meaning. Jonners came in first after short-cutting to where he predicted the BC would be.  He emphasizes some misgivings over the lack of a sweep.  The hare drove off in his car to go looking for the lost hounds (not all Hares would do that). The runners eventually made it in, got their beer (the following week's bike hash short changed some hounds on beer), and the down-downs meted out all 'due punishment'.  Getting back to my opening quotation, the measure of an adventure might also be the tales that come of it, and this trail gave hashers something to talk about over beers at the public house.

I felt sorry for the Hare having to set the trail in the rain, but fortunately for the small number of  stalwart hounds that came out the weather was sunny, and perfect for running.  The walker out numbered the runner, but kept the circle and BC merry.  The FRBs were Stoolie and Stroke, with the DFL being Ice Breaker.  In fact, with the exception of Yeast Infection, the entire running pack, until the end, were those just mentioned.  Fortunately the Hare marked out the entire trail, solving all the checks and check backs, maybe with the hope that more hounds would follow in our wake .  The devotion to trail marking duties paid off for our BLABs; Little Blow and Digger, with hounds in tow (Little Digger and Itchy Bitch), who ran the entire trail.  More FRBs would have been welcome to have softened the load.  I think we ran up Summit Hill at least 3 times!  Though he swore it was a normal length trail, it felt longer.  Hmmm, okay, he still has my sympathy for setting the trail in the rain.  On On to the Hare.

'Back to School' Hash.  I last minutes trail,  planned Friday, executed Saturday, among the alleys and well healed homes of south Oak Bay.  The BC was in Anderson Park.  It was dubbed 'back to school' due to it being the alternative to the last Stroke Alone trail, set from the samelocation on July 30th.  It was was a fine party cloudy day - perfect for running.  We had new hashers and a virgin join us (hope they enjoyed the outing).  There were even wolves on the trail, along with  cheezies too!

The Salt Spring Island 'Hippy' Campout Hash.  A thoroughly enjoyable weekend, with glorious weather, where my meager camping gear was  put to use (another return on my investment). We, yet again, got to run a trail that hashers had not run before.  The trail led through woods and up hills to views (and a YBF), and through stinging nettles -Blue Balls couldn't find a swamp, so nettle was his consolation shiggy.  The co-hare made the trail interesting with devilishly difficult to find marks, and thus The Cuff was brought out and put to messy use punishing the 'innocent' (or so they claimed), and perhaps waste some beer.  This hare was glad to have had the opportunity to wash the sweat and beer of in another of Salts Spring Island lakes.  We also got to see how rammed  earth homes are build (E.G. see Randy Bachman’s Salt Spring home) visiting with Bachman's builders, Meiror Kranenhoff, of Terra Firma, at the builder's  home.  It was there where we swam in the lake off his back yard.  On-afters was pot-luck at the campground with a great variety of tasty food and great beer, sitting around the propane powers campfire, free of annoying smoke, and not a mosquito to be seen or heard (keep that a secret from the rest of Canada) with a wondrous canopy of stars over our heads!

The Gordon Head 'Olympics' Hash and BBQ pool party.  It was a perfect day for a pool party.  Whoremoan set 10 events at various local school grounds.  These included play set obstacle courses, basket ball nets, soccer nets, and swing sets.   As the day was warm, and the trial seemed  long hashers decided beer was about due when we got to the 6 events.  The decathlon became a sexatholon.  The route was a walkers, runners, and cyclist's route, so the slowest common denominator set the pace. Nonetheless SBC told me her cycle computer recorded 11KM by the time we got to the 6th event.  Hats off to Whoremoan for the imagination and ambitiousness of his trail.  It was a lot of fun.  On-afters had a swimming pool!  This was perfectly timed with hot warm weather, and a brand new BBQ.  We had burgers (various kinds), coleslaw, potato salad ,chips and salsa, and beer.   SHIT had bowed out of the run ("It's too hot"), but joined us for the BBQ, and Stuffer returned home from work to join in.

The dog day of summer, Cougarbait's Birthday Hash, and BBQ. It being a beautiful sunny day, with a slight cooling breeze off the water. Despite it being a BC Day along weekend a couple dozen hashers showed up to 'follow' a Stroke Alone trail.  We had some old-timers come out too, but I am sure it was the promised of free beef. The only mishap was the loss of our RA - an uncanny event given she was following Stroke. We found her, and she got her BC beer. The walkers under the direction of a precise map, and Pisstifferous missed the special Cougar Cutoff viewpoint, but arrived at the BC at the same time as the runners - perfect timing made so by the pack short-cuttng part of the run. The BBQ was masterfully operated by our very own Chef Double Hump, and hashers came through with a variety of salads, berry crumble and pie, and Nanaimo bars. Pisstifferous kindly paid the tab for white and red wine, various Whistler Brewery beer, burgers, buns, condiments, and a spectacular venue - hashers now want a hot tub built there for the next event. We even have 'trail leftovers'. Stroke had two trails, and may one day use the second - see if he can lose the RA again.

Oaklands Bowker Creek culvert run.  The 'under'urban run.  A uniquely long run, 8 km true trail, of which 2 km of which we're underground exploring the graffiti galleries of Bowker Creek culverts.  It was warm and sunny, and not only had a negative elevation (below ground), but climbed Summit Park hill.  Hashers earned their beer.  Just Diana was eager to help, but caught a bug, and couldn't make it to assist haring the trail.  Blue Balls loves shiggy so this run was him delving the depth of his love for generating wet feet during the driest part of the year.  The graffiti art was the icing on the cake!  Click on the photo of the culvert opening, and read the  posters  where the author writes, "Reading about redox boundaries will put you to sleep - and this is a creepy place to sleep." and that sponges, which represent early simple animals, didn't have special tissues to allow them to mambo.  You will also learn the relevance of the Cambrian Explosion being the final arrangement that placed mouths and butt-holes at opposite ends of the body, "which is a Good Thing."

As the hare was the web master it would be a conflict of interest to blow his own horn.  I'll keep to the facts Jack.  Speaking of Jack, we were sorry to miss Jack-off, who got lost on the Internet even before getting to the trail, and couldn't find where the run started.  We had a hardy, but modest collection of 16 walkers and runners.  It was sunny and warm, but windy and naturally air conditioned.  No one got lost on the run.  The walker route was not long enough, but they all seemed to like that it was a well a marked trail.  Walker had to wait for the runners.Runners kept actually stopping at the 7 'View Graffiti' point on the run.  Wet Taco I should have down-downed for slowing down the pack, because as he said, "The light is wonderful!"  Whatever turns his enlightened crank.  I took the easy path to making a trail a piece of art by making the trail follow the art.

It was a hot day.  The run was urban and devious. No 'Xs', and the run was very very very long.  Well at least from the perspective of Stroke, who had fallen behind at the first check, never able to catch-up.  The Hare didn't sweep the trail, and until the last KM of what seemed to be a 7KM true-trail run, none of the checks were marked out. Stroke missed the BC, the beer, and the circle.  On his way home Blue Balls found him just short of the BC, still doggedly following trail, and kindly redirected him to the On-After.  'You missed it all!', he said.  Stroke survived, a welcome cold beer handed to him from Double Hump, who had loyally kept safe his back pack keys and wallet. 

The Annual Red Dress Run
The weather could not have been better, the dresses were never redder, the beer as tasty as ever, and the trail never shorter.  Ah, it was a good red dress run!

In addition the proceeds of registration allowed the VH3 to give back to the community through a $425 donation to the Gift of Good Food.

Click here to see who came.

Click here to see a planned map found by in an flour bag by the Scouts of the following CRRAP BHash

The "Pain in the Ass" Run, in sympathy for sciatica sufferers.  It was a perfect, sunny day, A Goldilocks day - not to warm, not tp cool.  Deep Shit set a cunning trail through parts of Esquimalt that, in memory, no one had hashed through before, but only a handful of this pack has either, as the sweep didn't sweep, and various hound were lost long enough to have missed the new territory.  No one ran the entire trial as its convulsions naturally lead to intentional and unintentional short-cutting - except for Stroke who ended up long cutting (and no one followed him).  The Hare set the trail walking it, leaving this FRB to conclude, from the number of hills, that walking hares can be brutal!  The BC was at the top of High-Rock park.  And on this adventure there were plenty of walkers; the medium age was probably over 45 (and that's probably being kind). Boomerangs back too (so I am being kind on the medium age!) Gave Stroke the Yangong Hash from Myanmar, which was exceedingly kind of him.  Boomer will be headed back soon to the sun full-fill another contract. 

This was an Easter themed run with a good turnout, and an almost perfect running day.  In a late message to the hounds the Hares warned of shiggy, and to bring and extra set of dry shoes and sox, but the trail provided no such need, and was all-in-all very civilized.  It even had an Easter egg hunt. Not all the Easter eggs were found, and hashers shamelessly left plastic eggs somewhere inPortage Inlet Linear Park between the end of St. Giles Street and the big rock.  There is at least one egg with a customized bottle cap, and one piece of paper stating you will get a large bottle of craft beer if you find it.  Whether Mismanagement would support this claim if the egg is found after the 'official hunt' is still up in the air.

This Saint Patrick's Day run came with all the trapping; lots of green, with hats with shamrocks on them (and some with other herbs), and one person with a little  talking Leprechaun on his shoulder with batteries in his groin (the Leprechaun not the hasher) - the Leprechaun was a 'carryover' from previous years event (may be more than one), and the engineers in the pack discovered the hard truth that the batteries were not replaceable.  The rain threatened, but held off, and there was Irish Cream on a cool windswept peak of Christmas Hill. Cock-a-Leeky pitched in to assist Highbeam on fairly short notice, which for that she should be honoured, along with the presence of jelly beans at religion - in some eyes, both were of equal important... except for the pink ones.

The "Not really Saint David's Day" Run
The Hares scouted this trail half a dozen times. The possible routes mapped, and measures, using the latest and greatest technology.  When the hares went to set it, we got lost twice, and had to 'wing-it'.  Originally there was going to be a Tequila shot stop, then on the night before it was discovered it came just before Saint David's Day - important to Wales.  Not finding any Welsh alcohol, but a dragon is on the Welsh flag, the hounds ended up getting shots or 67% proof Voodoo Tiki Green Dragon Lime Infused Tequila.  Green Dragon, rather than red, because it's spring, and there is a lot of green around!  The run had some shiggy, but not as much as we (well Blue Balls ) hoped for.  The rain held off, and hashers seemed to enjoy the run.

Valentine's Day  Army of Darkness Run It was a half decent day all things considered, and there were prized for correctly answered question about the film 'Army of Darkness'.  On trail were many pink plastic horse were to be found, and lots of water.  Keeping one's feed dry was the real challenge.

It has been a while since a run had been set out in and around Saanichton, and it was about time.  Centennial park, with all its trails makes it an enticing choice.   On trail Stroke fondly remember the hash "Bowling for Grog" set in late July 2008 by dearly departed Frontal Lobotomy (A.K.A GROG!!!) and Deep Shit  where a similar trail took the hounds wine tasting at Marley's Farm Winery , it was 46 acres, and the only fruit winery on Vancouver Island, but was permanently closed later that year.  Preemie and Digger showed great hash cleverness setting trails that kept the FRBs working for their beer, even though the area covered wasn't huge, yet the trail was still a good 6 K.  We had only modest shiggy and mild weather.

Annual New Year's Day Hangover Run and Potluck Dinner.  This year it was decided not to have a Polar Bear swim at the end of the run - too much sand in the tub last year. The weather was sunny and mild, and the run had a couple clever YBFs, with some hopes that the FRBs would find them.  Happy Sperm seemed to be the YBF ringleader, and was not disappointed as SBC came upon the first YBF and Stroke the second.  SBC's run tracker recorded just over 6KM to the BC.  The potluck dinner was excellent, with various hot savory dishes, and not too many deserts.   The hot tub was available, but it seemed that the lack of prior cold water reduced the desire for hot water, and only a few availed themselves of the tub.   I believe modesty, or perhaps abundant good taste, held back those who forgot to bring swim suits.